Wednesday, February 9, 2011

The Rules...

Yes, the entire premise of this blog post came about because I needed an excuse to post this picture
The rules; they are the guiding light of our hobby. Without them, Warhammer would be nothing more than a cool back story, some pictures, and a whole bunch of awesome looking (yet completely worthless) models. So, in a small way (sarcasm intended) the rules are kind of important. Yet, some people still are not satisfied, their hatred for specific rules filling the forums and covering blogs. TLOS here, Wound allocation there, everyone has that one they love to hate. Most of them, i don't really have an issue with. A select few, however, have earned my contempt.


Night Fighting


Apparently, just cause it's standard issue today doesn't mean jack.
Night fight has to be one of my least favorite rules in the history of Warhammer 40,000, mostly because I always forget about it. 


How many people have rolled to hit, wound, got that glorious penetrating hit, and then Lady Luck shines on you and that 6 rolls on the table for the damage chart. You jump up and down, thanking the powers that be, until your opponent utters those dreaded words, "hey can you see that? Isn't it night fighting?" Your emotions do a 180, you mutter every curse you can think of, sometimes making new ones up. You roll your to see dice, and you aren't even close.


I think my biggest thing with night fighting is that it really doesn't bring anything to the game. I have no problem with rules that encourage a certain style of play or bring something new. Night fighting does nothing except piss you off and hurt shooty armies. It is one of those rules that has been around forever, and just keeps getting put into the books out of habit.


Defensive Weapons


No matter how beautiful your tank is,
 2/3rds of it is useless
In my honest opinion, one of the dumbest things GW ever did was change defensive weapons to 4 and under, as opposed to the previous 5 and under. This basically made heavy bolters pointless. 


Yeah, GW I am gonna pay 25 points for those heavy bolter sponsons that I can't shoot unless I sit still. Retarded. Maybe my hatred for this rule change is based solely around me playing Blood Angels and their fast vehicles all the time and then being constantly frustrated when i go back to C:SM and can't move and shoot crap. Either way, it is mildly irritating, and didn't improve the game at all.


Pivoting and assaults


Who pivoted now?!?!
I remember the first time I heard this rule. I had moved 2 rhinos up the last turn at full speed. The next turn, i spun those bad boys around and unloaded two full squads of plague marines and charged them into a big squad of orks. Ol' Pariah Stevo quickly informed me that I couldn't do that. 


I was confused, i said "pivoting doesn't count as moving".  Then he showed me the rule. Stupid. So wait, if you pivot you can fire 300 lascannons but that 5 man scout squad can't walk or punch a grot, all because the Vehicle TURNED AROUND?!?!?!?! Another seemingly pointless rule that adds nothing to the game.


Jet Packs


Tau - So terrible in Assault, we have to
model us being good at it to make us feel better.
This rule is not necessarily flawed, or a game breaker, or the result of a poor thought process. I think the only reason that i dislike jet packs is because this single rule basically defines the only army that has access to them. 


The assault phase is my personal favorite part of 40k. It separates the men from the boys, it puts hair all over your nether regions, it is the epitome of my phallus is larger than your phallus. 


And how do the almighty vaginal faced, blue skinned 3 toed communist aliens spend this phase? By running away. Really? How could any one play an army that completely sucks at a part of the game so bad that the best thing they can do during it is run away??? I mean even non assaulty armies have some decent assault units. Guard have Straken Mobs/ogryn, Eldar have Banshees, Tau have.............kroot? Pitiful, just pitiful. Hide behind your guns, Tau wiener heads, cause even a railgun turns into nothing more than a S5 beat stick when i get close enough...



Typical results of Tau assaults
Now, don't think that I have a hatred toward 5th edition or anything. In fact, my sentiments toward the rule set is the opposite. 5th is, imho, the best, most complete set of rules GW has released, and it has definitely made the game more enjoyable. There is always, however, a few imperfections in even the best made product. These are just a few of my personal gripes.


So, what rules piss you off? what makes you cringe every time you read it, or makes you throw a codex/brick of dice every time it comes up?

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